Monday, June 20, 2011

DECISIONS DECISIONS

Well despite being crazy EOFY busy at work, I've hit a bit of a middle-of-the-day-slump and have decided to hop on and update my blog. I'm sure it'll inspire me to work hard for the rest of the day LOL, especially as it may just clear my head of budgets and the like.

It seems like bloggers are finding or declaring their eating manifestos / secrets to success or short term wins lately. I love reading about these things and find myself nodding my head or just smiling to celebrate their successes. I feel its a bit premature to declare my personal wins or successes even though I'm pretty happy with where I'm at and how I'm feeling and seeing things a little differently to before. Now to just get some weeks under my belt like this and I too will write more about it. Its just that I feel like I've only done 2kms out of a marathon so its a bit premature to put it out there.

Speaking of marathons ...... NO I'm not contemplating one at all. In fact I've been thinking lots about running / not running / walking / other training etc and am slowly coming around to the (obvious) fact that maybe running isnt for me right now. WOW I've said it (gasp). I thought I'd have a meltdown if that was to be my fate but slowly commonsense is prevailing and I'm finally able to ask myself "why do I run when it causes me so much pain" (both during the run and even worse in every day life). There has been little enjoyment in my running lately yet I have soldiered on waiting for my mojo to return. As I write this my left glute is plagued by constant sharp shooting pains and no matter how much I try to relieve my ITBs they (especially the left side) just hurts constantly. I'm sick of it.

So when I get my mojo together I'll start a bit of self rehab and rethink what my training will be in the meantime. Sadly even walking fast causes pain but I might have to just suck that up. Down the track it may be that 1:1 physio / pilates is my only chance of fixing this for good (and seriously draining my bank balance LOL).

So here I am contemplating not running, not feeling that endorphin rush, that runner's high, that sense of achievement at the end of nice long run. It does sadden me a bit yet on the other hand I long to live pain free.

Decisions. Decisions.

M

2 comments:

  1. Can I say it please? Pretty please? Hallefuckenlujah :). I know you love running Magda but I think your body could do with the break.

    And just for your info. Ever since I was in hospital I've been lucky to walk once or twice a week and I've done nothing else, no weights, no boxing, nothing. My bed is far too warm of a morning :) and the day just seems to slip by. I've missed it yes but I realise my body needs the rest to make more blood. I'll get back to it one day, when I'm ready. And my clothes keep getting loser so now I wonder wtf I ever exercised to lose weight for ;).

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  2. Oh Shelley thats priceless. I must admit I'm having a minor internal meltdown over this but deep down I think its the right thing - at least for now LOL.

    So here I am taking a big deep breath and a leap of faith that I will not run and I will not turn into the goodyear blimp. Wish me luck.

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