THAT 'INTERNALLY HAPPY PLACE'

In case you didnt notice, tonight is the last night of November. Therefore, tomorrow is the beginning of the last month of the year. Wow, where did it go? Not just November - which seemed to come and go in a flash - but the whole year. Normally I like to do some reflection at the end of each month but I think you all know that November was pretty topsy turvy for me. Ups and downs, steps forward and back, same old, same old. I see no point in rehashing it all.

 

Which brings me to where my blog might be going and how I can best express some of the stuff thats important to me now. I've made no secret of the fact that in 2013 I will turn 50. I'm not one of those ladies who hides their age or tries to lie their way out of their years or keep it all totally hush hush. Hell, if I had my way, I'd tell everyone that I'm 67 only so I could hear "gee you look FANTASTIC for your age" LOL. But I cant get away from the deep burning desire to get myself to a really 'internally happy place' for my 50th birthday. A place where I have conquered my demons (and you know what they are) and I live my life with an internal calm and balance.

 

I can picture it. I can sense it. I can taste it. I can hear it. I know what it is in both the physical and mental sense (sorry, the spiritual eludes me). Its not about a number on the scales, or how fast/long I can run or how heavy I can lift/squat. Its not about eliminating pressure or stress (cause that aint gonna happen for a LONG time) nor is it about being in a never-ending blissful state of nirvana. But its all here in my head and my goal is to make it happen.

 

So I want my blog to be the record of my journey working through the changes I want to make. I dont doubt that there will be ups and downs but I have a destination that I want to achieve by July next year and that requires taking some steps forward. Onwards, I say.

 

:-) M